That time of year.....

So, it's that time of year....the time between November 1st and 12th.  The time for disagreements over Christmas decorations going up before Remembrance Day and whether it's proper or not.  

I'm always amazed at the amount of letters to editors, comments written below newspaper articles, horrendous disagreements and name calling after Facebook posts and memes that I see.

The first thing that spouts out of the mouths of those who think that not a single decoration should go up before November 12th  is "disrespect." "You're disrespecting our Veterans." "Show some respect" 

First of all, tell me exactly how me (or you, or anyone) putting up a wreath or snowman or a string of lights is disrespecting a Veteran?  Don't just say "I'm sure you can wait a few weeks to put up your decorations", I want you to tell me how it's disrespectful. Really, how? Do you know the meaning of "disrespectful"? Let's look it up:

"A lack of respect or courtesy. Being insulting. Having scorn, disdain or disregard for someone."

All of that has nothing....nothing to do with the way I hang things in my house, and it's certainly irrelevant to the way I feel about Veterans.  The two things are not comparable, they're apples and oranges. Decorating before November 11th is certainly premature as far as I'm concerned, but it's in no way disrespectful. Decorating before December 1st is equally annoying to me. Or even before December 15th.

Ask a Veteran if they care, the majority of them don't worry about who puts decorations up, and when. It's a cliché to be sure, but being able to make those kinds of choices is what our freedom is about, and no one has the right to say that someone else is wrong and/disrespectful because they are decorating for a holiday. 

I think the lack of Health care, the diminishing pension, and the poor government support that our Veterans receive is a much more pressing issue than a display of Christmas decorations. And if you're not so much upset with Joe-Down-The-Street putting his lights up before the snow flies and the temperature drops to below zero, but you're actually upset with the commercial stores setting up their displays, well, why should a retail organization be any sort of moral compass for us? Who really cares? If it bothers you, don't shop there. If you don't like the way my house looks, don't walk by. Such false outrage.

What it boils down to, for me, is that no one can tell me how I am supposed to honour the dead, and you certainly can't tell me when my holiday spirit should kick in.

You want to respect our Veterans? Instead of getting frothy at the mouth with anger over something as petty as a seasonal display, maybe take a Veteran a meal or take them on an outing. I'm not even going to list the ways to help.....you know the kinds of things that can be done as well as I do.

Donate some money to the poppy fund and wear your poppy. And if you want to decorate early and enjoy your decorations, do so. And if you don't want to....then don't. It's not worth arguing about.

 

Happy Thoughts.

I have a friend who has two children. When she was pregnant with her second, which was totally unexpected, she was terrified that she wouldn't have enough love in her heart for the new baby. She loved her first one so much that she couldn't possibly imagine having any love leftover for another child. I told her that she would be completely amazed at how her heart would expand and that there would be more than enough love to go around. That the heart doesn't have a finite capacity for love, it has an infinite amount of room. (Of course, the heart is just a muscle that doesn't actually feel any kind of emotion at all, but you know what I mean.)

Anyhow, of course when the new babe was born, she was totally besotted and instantly in love. 

And now she worries about when it's time to "let go" and how do you hand your children over to someone else? To have some other person be the Number One in your child's life? I mean when you give your entire self to being Number One to your kids... how do you just give that up? When every moment of your life is spent marveling at the love you have for your children, and seeing the love that is reciprocated, it's a pretty awesome thing.  That little seed of jealousy at giving that love to someone else is planted really, really early. 

However, I am here to tell her (and you!) that it's just like having a new baby...when your son (I can't speak for daughters, since I don't have one....it might be different with girls), when your son finds the woman who is right for him, his true love, the one who makes him smile and makes it worth while to get up each day....you are filled with nothing but joy. Honestly! True story!

I feel sad for women who don't get along with their in-laws, be it daughter-in-law or mother-in-law or even sister-in-law. Holy cow, life is far too fragile to have family animosity. And it can be cut short so quickly that there is often no time to make amends. 

I am incredibly fortunate to have the daughter-in-law that I have. And so fortunate that her mom and dad raised her the way they did. Be happy for your kids....if they're happy, be happy for them. It's simple, really.