No. I mean a mixed breed dog. A mongrel. A mutt. But give it a fancy name and "Boom!" You now own a designer dog....worth mega-bucks.
My friend, let me explain,a fancy hyphenated name does not turn a mongrel into a purebred. But give a cute puppy a cute name and someone will pay big bucks.
It seems to mostly be oodles of poodles. Labradoodles, golden doodles and schnoodles, just for a start. Then there the oodles of poodles crossed with smaller dogs; malti-poo, cockapoo, Yorki-poo, , peke-a-poo.
....I don't know where it ends. Nor do I know how to spell the names, mostly because there is no official spelling because there is no real breed. They are made up! I want to cross an Elkhound with a poodle and tell people my dog is elk poo. That might make it funny, but it doesn't make it a breed. Would you spend $500 on Elk Poo? No? But on a Golden Doodle? Yes, please. Ai-yi-yi....
Here's a fun fact: These dogs have no breeding standards nor any standardized breeding records, no clubs, and no plan for any of that in the future. Which means, no AKC acceptance letters. So....what's the point? Why go to a pet store, or a back yard breeder or a stranger on the Internet and pay huge dollars when you can simply go to your local SPCA or animal shelter and find something that is just as adorable, just as loving, and SO much cheaper and will (most likely) have its shots and spaying/neutering all done? Plus, you are giving a dog a home.
Now, before you tell me that there are designer registries, let me tell you that those so-called registries are just as made up as the designer cross between a Bull Dog and a Shitztu....in other words, Bull-Shit. They are just fueling mill breeding and fooling the public into thinking they are getting a legitimate breed of dog, and a high quality dog. They say when you mix breeds deliberately to get the best qualities of each, you will get an exceptional dog. Well, they know the same as the designer cross between a Jack Russell and a Shitzu....in otherwords, jack-shit. You can easily end up with a dog that has the worst of both breeds, so their statement is pointless.
So you might get this...a "Canardly". As in "I can hardly tell what she is."
Or, you might luck out and get this: a bull pug.
Or this: a pitsky. (Pitty-husky)
Now, most of today's purebred dogs were indeed developed from careful combing of different breeds for specific purposes, and there have been amazing results. But we are talking about many decades of careful work, and to deliberately market a "breed" to an unknowing consumer who may not realize that spending hundreds and hundreds of dollars on a mongrel is inexcusable.
I don't want to offend those of you who own these designer dogs, but come on, your local shelter is filled with these "designer dogs" that are desperate for a home. Go and pick your pet and give it a designer name of your own.
My favorites:
Collie and Lhasa Apso: a Collapso.....- dog that falls down a lot.
Collie and a Malamute: a Commute. Take this dog to work.
Malamute and Dalmation: a Mutation....a homely dog.
A pointer and a Setter: Pointsetter, good for an Xmas gift.
Bloodhound and Labrador: a Blabrador...a dog that talks too much.
Deerhound and any Terrier: a Derrière...a dog that sits all the time
Keeshond and any Setter: a Keester. Gets along well with Derrières.
Chihuahua and Whippet: a Chiapet. Order them from TV, 3 for $19.99 plus shipping,
And we mustn't forget:
Cocker Spaniel and a Rottweiler: .....well, a CockRot. (A good gift for a philandering ex)
How about a Cocker Spaniel and a Maltese Terrier? Figure it that one out yourself.
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(I've heard these over the years...I can't take credit for making them all up, even though I'd like to.)
So dont brag to me about your designer multi-named dog that you take for walks with your designer duds and designer coffee cups. Instead, show me that you genuinely care, and get your adorable mixed-mutt from a shelter.
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